A Different Kind of Normal

My husband graduated college in 2010. Not the greatest time to search for a career as we were deep into a recession. We decided to take a crazy chance and embark on an adventure halfway across the country. We made the move to Austin, TX. We’d never been there before, didn’t know a soul and didn’t have any job prospects. So basically, we were totally set! Ha..


Austin is an incredible city full of amazingly kind people. There’s talent beyond belief in both music AND food. Breakfast tacos were pretty much a daily staple. The scenery is beautiful and unique both downtown and among the rolling hills. Our time in Austin was a dream… and also some of our most difficult years! It was a crazy contrast at times. We were thousands of miles away from our families and the craving for littles of our own was stronger than ever. We really wanted to make a life there, but also struggled with figuring out just how to make it all work! I found an amazing OBGYN there who also happened to be a fertility specialist. Over the course of about a year and a half, It was determined I had PCOS, rotated between trying to kill the cysts off with birth control and taking fertility drugs like Femara (because I already knew how much I hated Clomid!) and then back to a month of birth control here and there to kill the cysts off again that the wonderful fertility drugs grew…  I also underwent six painful IUI procedures during this time- all of which were unsuccessful at getting me pregnant. It was a roller coaster.. Every month you’re filled with hope and yet the same daunting feelings overcome your world over and over. focusandbreath In the middle of this “aggressive” time in our lives, I had a laparoscopy done to remove cysts where my doctor found moderate Endometriosis that he also removed at that time. The month after the laparoscopy procedure, a sweet little miracle happened. We were planning on taking a few months off of fertility procedures and… Bam I got pregnant! 

It was quite the shock. I remember taking the test that morning, waking my husband (he worked graves and was exhausted) and when I showed it to him, he thought it was an ovulation detector stick, rolled over thinking I was telling him it was time to “make a baby” (anyone struggling with infertility knows this task can become somewhat mechanical). Haha.. After two years of fertility meds and procedures, I got pregnant naturally. Life is funny. Life is also cruel.. as we found at 8 weeks along, it was actually a Blighted Ovum and the overwhelming happiness turned to an empty cavern in my heart. I went through a D&C and all of a sudden I was back to being a barren, infertile person. It was an awful time.


(My cat, Bug, laid by my side through the dark recovery.)

You find a way to pick up the pieces after life hits you with disappointment. You keep moving forward, you laugh with your loved ones. You keep making decisions and allow happiness to settle in. Honestly, I can’t remember much about the next few months… I guess I took some time off to refocus. Life in Austin continued and we truly enjoyed experiencing all it had to offer over the next year or so..


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